Thursday, Nov. 17, 2005 - 9:58 PM
(aka Joyful Annoys 2)
Oh, and I don't mean from me�I mean from the people who can't accept that someone might have an opinion that differs from theirs.
If I don't think this tour was a good idea, if I'm not impressed with everything I've seen (which, I'll be honest, isn't much�I love him, but I didn't download a bunch of stuff from that last Christmas tour either, so why should I go after stuff from this tour, which I'm even LESS interested in?), if I have anything at all negative to say, then I'm not accepting of Clay as a true artistic genius, I'm not a real fan, I'm forcing my limited scope of what Clay's allowed to be on him, I wouldn't know a great show if it bit me in the ass�whatever.
But before you pass on reading this because you think I'm just gonna rag on Clay again, let me emphasize something�I'm a HUGE FAN, and I don't just mean my knockers. I love him, I think he's gorgeous, and he makes me tingly�then again, I can say the same things about my husband, but y'all don't wanna hear about that. I think Clay's a remarkable human being with oodles of potential, and I think he'll have a long career if he keeps being a good guy and doesn't make too much of an ass of himself. And I'm more than willing to fight the battles he passes on, whether or not he realizes it.
Let me also say that I have not seen the show, nor am I going to. This tour's not coming anywhere near me, just like last year's Christmas tour, and that's the breaks. I cannot comment on his performances in this show because, except for very rare circumstances, I have not seen them. But I can comment on what this show *is*, based on what people who have seen it are telling me (some love it, some not so much). And I can comment on how I feel about the way it's being presented/handled/promoted.
Don't try to yell at me because you think I'm bashing Clay. I'm not. I was pissed when I wrote this. I'm not pissed now. Disappointed, sure. Confused, definitely. Disturbed�well, yeah.
People do things that I don't think are all that great all the time. It's only when someone I care about does something I think is a huge mistake that I bother to voice my opinion so vehemently. So, Clay (as if you'd ever be here reading this�I'm not that overrun with self-importance!), if I hurt your feelings, I'm truly sorry. I know I say things in a harsh manner sometimes (who, YOU, Julie?), but it's generally in an attempt to make it funny. Don't get cry in your eyes because one of your fans got upset. She'll get over it. And don't send your producer to explain to me what you're trying to do. That dog won't hunt.
(As a reminder of how much I love you, darlin'�there's something new and yummy over at Miz Julie's Storyville�adults only, please!)
Some people are really loving this tour. I'm glad for that. I'm sincerely happy that so many people who spent their money on tickets (and in lots of cases, airfare and lodging) are leaving your show with big smiles on their faces. I would never wish someone would have a bad time, just so I could be "right". This isn't about being right. This is about being me and being able to express myself when I have an opinion. The main reason I'm putting my opinion here and not on a message board is because when I'm here I can't get yelled at. (Well, I suppose they could try, but so far, people are generally being appreciative of what I've written.)
But, as it turns out, I've got some more to say. Big surprise, I know.
Some miscellaneous points�
Timing is everything. Despite the fact that it feels like Clay's been around forever, it's only been two years since he released Measure of a Man. Which, because Christmas albums don't actually count in terms of a career, is his ONLY ALBUM. Two years. One album. Ten gazillion concerts. One album. Oh and one B-side of a single.
It's far too early in his career to be seeing what he can get away with. You have to have a career first. Anyone can have a successful first album, provided the publicity is there. (and, I will remind the fans, 3 million is a damn fine number, but let's do a comparison�Maroon 5 put out their first album in 2003 also, and in 2004 alone, it was still chugging along with a whopping 2.7 million copies. That's 2.7 million the year AFTER it came out. Norah Jones's Come Away With Me went platinum 8 times over, and it was her first album, too. And I've beat this horse before, but how much you wanna bet her fans buy only one CD apiece?) But anyone who pays attention to the music biz knows that the second album is what determines staying power. The first album can either be the genius of a producer finding all the right songs to propel a sure-thing into fast-burnout orbit, or the culmination of the life's work of a songwriter who suddenly has 10 months to create a dozen songs that equal the quality of his first effort�or it can be a first look at an artist who absolutely will prove the test of time.
Once that test is passed, a career can withstand a Chris Gaines Project or an Under the Cherry Moon. But you have to show the world who you are as an artist before you can fiddle about with other stuff. Unless, of course, who you are is the next Mannheim Steamroller.
And I hate when people feel it's necessary to compare Idol alumni, but there was an article the other day about Kelly Clarkson that referred to Ruben Studdard and Clay Aiken as people who used to be household names. Used to be. Remember that, people. The general public doesn't know he's still out there, and they couldn't care less. Kelly went to work immediately on her second album (remember, she'd already been working on it before she and Clay went on tour together?) and it's been a bigger success than most people thought it would be. She's a big star now. You can't flip radio stations without hearing her at least once every few minutes. I live in a city where Clay isn't played on the radio, because he's simply not popular enough for the radio stations to care about. He ain't that big a star�unless the kind of bad publicity that comes with gay-bashing comedians and people trying to prove his foundation isn't all that charitable count more than anything positive. (Angelina Jolie and Ashley Judd make the cover of People for their humanitarian work�Clay gets a blurb in the back of the TV Guide, which is only noticed by *us*.)
And this is now, by the way, the SECOND "I'm gonna do whatever I feel like doing because my fans will follow me anywhere" tour. I loved the Jukebox Tour. It was a lot of fun. But it was a weird thing for him to do when he really should have been working on his second album.
Being a recording artist means you record stuff. I'd love for Clay to do that again real soon. If he's not too busy writing plays and getting the Nobel Prize for physics or something.
I love theatricality as much as the next chick. I think it's great when a singer/musician/band makes the effort to PUT ON A SHOW, rather than just schlumping out on stage and recreating tracks that we've already heard on their albums. I can listen to Clay's music in the privacy of my home without fear of some bitch whooping it up and standing on her seat to get his attention and ruining my evening. I can sing along with him in my car at a red light, which, despite the price of gas, is still cheaper than a plane ticket to Ohio. So one of the things I truly love about Clay is that he's so much fun onstage and makes such an effort to PERFORM and CONNECT, rather than just show up and collect a paycheck.
Some of the best concerts I've ever been to involved a guy breathing fire and vomiting blood, fercryinoutloud! I love showbiz. Sequins. Streamers. Explosions. Give me the ol' razzledazzle. I'm a sucker. But that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm itching to see actors speaking oft-rehearsed lines about the Meaning Of Christmas, no matter who wrote them. (Especially if some of them are merely under the impression that they belong onstage�but I digress.)
Two words to ponder: Dennis DeYoung.
If someone buys a ticket to a concert, they should get a concert. Even if it's the Best Play Ever Written, it's still not a concert. All Clay's fans aren't these rabid, constantly-online, can't-get-enough Claymates. Imagine being someone who just bought a ticket to what they thought was a Christmas concert, and suddenly there are actors onstage�okay, clearly some people can't imagine how anyone could be disappointed. I've read people describing this show as if they'd just witnessed the Second Coming. But give it a try. It's actually possible that people who went there expecting to be entertained thought Clay looked and sounded amazing, but were otherwise meh about the show. I've read one fan's account of looking down at her ticket and thinking it would be more truthful to call the show the Joyful Noise Tour 2005 featuring Clay Aiken, because he was the guy who just got more solos than anyone else, but most of the show wasn't him.
(As for the people who love it, I have to wonder how many of them would enjoy watching the exact same show, with the exact same cast�minus Clay, Quiana, Jacob, and Angela. Still worth fifty bucks? If not�doesn't that mean the show wasn't that good, but some of the people in it are worth watching?)
And it's pretty telling that the majority of the pictures I've seen of Clay from this tour are of him NOT singing. Standing. Sitting. Sometimes looking like he wants to sell me some chicken. (Oh Lord, that white suit couldn't be a more obvious afterthought. "Angels wear white" indeed!) But not singing. Weird for a Clay Aiken concert, dontcha think?
Cowboy up, Clay. I can't believe you sent your producer out to do your dirties. *sigh*
You wanna be taken seriously as an artist? You wanna BE an artist, instead of a regurgitator of generic pop material? I would love that. I can't wait for you to show us what you're made of. I'm looking forward to really finding out who you are as an artist. That�s what your second album is going to be�a window into who you are and what is most important to you. That's why it's taking you so damn long, right? You want it to be YOU, to represent who you are. It's gonna be awesome.
But you know what an artist does? He pisses people off by being truthful. He touches some people with some pieces, and angers them with others. Art is subjective. We all come at it from our own perspectives and take from it what makes the most sense to us. That's why your fans see you in different ways, and we all think we're right. And that's also why, whether or not you believe it, lots of your fans have already had moments when they really didn't like something you did. Yup, they sure did. Maybe not in an angry way, but at least in a "I wish he hadn't done that" way. Scads of 'em. And it's okay.
It's okay because it's part of being an artist. You're not going to please everyone all the time, and sometimes you're really gonna hack people off. If you can't handle that, then keep on doing the same old shit you know always works to avoid any unpleasantness. Oh no, but if you do that, then some people will get mad because you keep doing the same show all the time. Dangit.
If you just make something pretty, someone will buy it because it matches her couch and it will go unnoticed on her wall. But if you make something thought-provoking and meaningful, people will remember it. Maybe they'll like it, and maybe they won't�but they'll never forget it. The most important thing a real artist does is accept criticism, learn from his mistakes, stand up for what he believes in, and keep on making art. Cowboy up and take it like a man. And definitely don't sic some woman on the people who criticize you.
And, by the way, the only thing I know about this Jaymes Foster Levy person, outside of producing this next album of yours, is that she was the Executive Producer of a pretty dang repugnant reality show�in my never to be humble opinion, of course. Someone who has a fairly famous and successful brother, as it turns out, but who, no matter how hard I look, has no real resume of her own. (My sister is nearly six feet tall, but I can't exactly go around making people think I'm a strong point-guard based on her height.) Not someone whose opinion I'm automatically going to hold in high regard. You having a working relationship with her, especially before I've seen one bit of product, ain't reason enough for me to care one way or the other about her opinion of what I think of you or this tour. Not really her business. But JFL is another rant for another time.
Just one more small point�
I think "Team Clay" is on my side with this one. No critics invited to shows to review it. No freebies given out to the media.
Can't trash the show if they're not there. Sneak into town, perform for an audience of only fans, sneak out before the press knows you've been there. Leave no trace. Change the marquis before the show's even over.
Seriously, who's talking about this tour besides the fans on the internet? 'Nuff said.
So that's it. He looks gorgeous, I hear he's in great voice, he's having a good time up there, and a lot of fans are raving about what a great show it is. I'm glad. But I still think it was a mistake. A shiny, pretty, heartfelt mistake.
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PS...well, whaddya know. Right after I posted this lil essay of mine, a review showed up. Thank you, Elyssa Andrus. You said it very well.
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