Thursday, Feb. 15, 2007 - 9:51 PM
Clay, seriously...and I say this with all due respect...WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO YOUR MOUTH???
Was there something wrong with your human teeth? (tm Chandler Bing)
Okay, you obviously made a mistake. You even acknowledged yourself that they were way too fucking white.
Even I can admit that you making faces like that is pretty darn cute. But it doesn�t excuse what you did.
What did you do? You did something ridiculous in the name of vanity.
There was nothing wrong with your teeth. NOTHING.
But you changed their shape, size, and color. Drastically.
Why?
Did someone convince you that because you�re in show business, you have to have work done? Did you buy into that plastic Hollywood ideal?
What�s next? You gonna get your ears pinned back? Reshape your nostrils? Have your freckles burned off with a laser? How about some botox around your eyes so they won�t crinkle when you smile? Or, better yet...let�s see if a surgeon can fix your mouth so your smile won�t be asymmetrical!
You weren�t perfect. But you were gorgeous. And you just fucked it up.
I guess all the kids you�re so into teaching by example are gonna get to look at themselves in the mirror now and wonder how soon they�ll be able to afford bullshit cosmetic procedures like that.
You know, it�s a good thing the rest of you looks so goddamn hot right now.
Waitaminute...you did this to distract me from your Valentine�s Day tradition of shaving off your sideburns, didn�t you?
You can be such an asshole, Clay.
Hey! Anyone for Chiclets?
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